Loren Stein
CONSUMER HEALTH INTERACTIVE

Note: This article has been localised for an Irish audience.

Horny old birds, dirty old men. These commonly used terms speak volumes about how society views older people who are interested in sex.

Experts say such derogatory labels reflect a deep level of discomfort in our youth-oriented culture with the idea that the elderly are sexually active. Sex is identified with reproduction, youthful attractiveness, and power -- and most young and even middle-aged people do not want to confront the inevitability of growing old.

So sexual intimacy among the elderly is a subject that people don't talk about much. The silence, say experts, allows misconceptions to flourish -- including the widespread assumption that older people lose interest in sex and are, or should be, asexual. But armed with a spate of recent studies that help dispel the myth that older people don't have sex or enjoy it, experts say the negative stereotypes couldn't be farther from the truth. There is no age limit on sexuality and sexual activity. While the frequency or ability to perform sexually will generally decline as the elderly experience the normal physiological changes that accompany ageing, reports show that the majority of men and women between the ages of 50 and 80 are still enthusiastic about sex and intimacy.

But older people may encounter an obstacle they hadn't expected: their adult children, who may be less than pleased to see their ageing parents as sexual beings. Such judgmental attitudes prevent many older people from moving in with each other or even having their partner stay over night. The topic may well lose some of its taboo status, however, as the baby boom generation enters its later years. With their increased numbers and a marked increase in life expectancy, older adults are now one of the fastest-growing segments of the Irish population.

One advantage of growing older is that personal relationships can take on increased importance as children and careers take a backseat. The elderly can devote more time and energy to improving their love lives. And while some older people may be forced to give up strenuous sports, sex is a physical pleasure many older people readily enjoy. A clear majority of men and women age 45 and up says a satisfying sexual relationship is important to the quality of life.

Both men and women can expect normal physiological changes as they age that may affect the way they experience sex. Experts say these changes are not usually a barrier to enjoying a healthy sex life, but couples may have to take more time for arousal. Postmenopausal women, for example, have lower levels of the hormone oestrogen, which in turn decreases vaginal lubrication and elasticity. In many cases, dryness can be relieved by something as simple as using a water-based lubricant like KY Jelly. Doctors can offer other remedies for more difficult cases.

Men may suffer from impotence or have more difficulty achieving and sustaining erections as their blood circulation slows and testosterone levels decrease. Impotence is also more prevalent in men who have a history of heart disease, hypertension, or diabetes. Now, however, sildenafil citrate (Viagra, prescription only) has aided some older men who weren't helped by other treatments.

Despite these hopeful prognoses, studies show that only a fraction of the elderly who could be treated for sexual problems actually seek medical help. That's too bad, experts say, because even serious medical conditions need not prevent the elderly from having a satisfying sex life. Older people should see a GP if they've lost interest in sex or are having sexual difficulties. Some sedatives, most antidepressants, excessive alcohol, and some prescription drugs have side effects that interfere with sex; a doctor can help adjust medication or set guidelines on alcohol intake. Illnesses, disabilities, and surgeries can also affect sexuality, but in general, even disease need not interfere with sexual expression.

The physical changes that occur with age can give older people a chance to revitalise their lovemaking by focusing more on intimacy and closeness instead of sex alone. Often less preoccupied with performance, they can express their affection and closeness in other ways.

Among older women who are widowed, divorced or single, finding a partner can be difficult. According to several reports, women make up the majority of the elderly without partners. The reasons: women live longer than men, and healthy older men tend to pair up with younger women. Older women are also judged by society as less attractive than their male counterparts, the old double standard.

This "partner gap" greatly inhibits women's social and sexual activity as they reach their senior years.

-- Loren Stein is a freelance writer in Palo Alto, California specialising in health and legal issues and a regular contributor to Consumer Health Interactive. She has written for WebMD, Hippocrates, and the Christian Science Monitor, among other publications.

This article has been revised by Vhihealthe for its audience and may contain, among other things, information or medical practices that are unique to Ireland. Neither Consumer Health Interactive nor the original author make any warranty as to the accuracy of the article as revised, and assume no responsibility for modified content.

First published June 12, 2001
Copyright © 2000 Consumer Health Interactive

or find more on: Back to top of page

See all readers' comments Comments Name (optional) E-mail (optional)